We Back

Hello!

It has been a long time since I have published any of my writings here. I have began many posts in my absence, but most of them felt off for one reason or another. And while I am sure there are many that have probably forgotten about this space of mine or maybe have not noticed my silence, I wanted to address it before I began to dive back into writing and posting.

I started this blog my first year of college because I felt that it was something the Lord was leading me to do. I have long loved writing, with a few very unfinished book chapters on pretty much every laptop we have owned since I was a child. Why during my freshman year the Lord asked me to start a blog, I am still unsure, other than it gave me some kind of outlet to sort out my mixed and heavy thoughts in a way that allowed me to get back to God. As nervous as I was to start this page and to begin posting, I have never really done it for others. When I post something, it has always been with God’s leading, just like the creation of this site.

As time went on, I heard friends talking poorly about some other’s blogs in a way that made me insecure of the things I shared, which caused me to question everything I shared from that point on, wondering if anyone cared. But the reality is, while I appreciate all who choose to read my words, I never started this page for the approval of others. This has all been a small act of obedience from the start created from the desires and dreams the Lord gave me long ago when He created me.

But to be vulnerable, it was more than insecurity that caused me to pause sharing in this space. Life threw me some more curveballs, and I had honestly felt like I had had enough. I was angry with God and could no longer pretend I wasn’t. My emotions were everywhere. My thoughts were everywhere. Things were hard and heavy and I was bitter and done on the inside. And though I have drafts written from that season, I was at least able to see that I could not share those words because they were not written from a heart one with God. While I believe that there is a time and place for emotion to show in these words, bitter emotion has no place in a space created out of obedience to the Lord.

And so I chose to step back and wait until I knew it was time again.

You may wonder why I am sharing this with you. As I said before, you may not have even noticed. You may not care about why I needed to take a break from this space. But I believe that I needed to share it because I want to be vulnerable and authentic in all that I say and do, even if it is imperfect but filled with the right heart. I believe that in order to have certain conversations, our heart must be known. And most importantly, I care that you know the heartbeat behind the words I share. I want to glorify the Lord through my obedience, through my words, and through my actions.

I also share this to say that my heart is not to get the approval of those who chose to read my blog. I am also not insecure from the opinions of those that do not enjoy spaces such as this. To each is their own, and this is mine. While I hope those who find themselves here enjoy what they read, I did not create this space for the approval of others but out of obedience to the One whose approval I already have.

You may also notice if you begin to explore the site that I have done a little upgrading. There are many conversations that I would love to create the space for here. I will still probably post without a rhyme or reason in timing, as life is busy and and the Holy Spirit is not constrained by time. Some posts may be back-to-back and others may be a few weeks apart.

I look forward to being back here, creating space for deeper conversations around some of the things God has placed on my heart, and ultimately, pointing it all back to Him.

-Maggie Tyler